Diligently Seek

  Into the river, Compelled where it wandered, I gasped only to catch The need to gasp. A moment to think - back To the plummet, while Every sense battled. Screaming. Run. Cold ripped into me. Pain cut at my ankles. Wet suffocation, a Black abyss. Regret. Panic. Forget. Sadness. What was I thinking then? There is nothing worth this Fall into all of the  Wild, good, night. Swim to the right again - Hit something under me - Slide over slimy scales: Swimming life The size of the creature, So calm in demeanor, The depth of the river Cannot match. Dying living Fishy Monster Right. Left. down. I cannot give into this, Mindless instinct kicks. Fuck what I’m dying for. I choose life. Right to the homeless place? Right to the family? Right to the miserable Loneliness? Left to the home I chose? Left to the cops and courts? Left to the battlefield? One soldier. Maybe staying. Maybe dying. Leg ripped open. Left to Sobriety. Left from the cavity. Left from the creature of Thrashing life. Memories o